I wasn’t going to blog about this, because I think there are far more important things to be discussed on this site-marriage equality, street harassment, the upcoming New Edition reunion and fat cheeked babies, among them. However, I have a feeling I’m going to keep getting asked about this and so I will write it out once and let that be the end of it.
Last night, I was looking at Twitter and saw a retweet from comedian Lisa Lampanelli: I retweeted it as follows “Knew someone would make this weak ass joke RT@LisaLampanelli President Bush and Clinton tried to kill Osama and failed! If you want someone dead, hire a Black guy”. I then replied to three people who commented to me about it as follows “She’s never been funny to me at all”, “She’s more annoying than offensive” and “Many comics do race well. @LisaLampanelli isn’t one of them.”
I don’t typically @ celebrities when I’m dissing them, because I think they have the right to enjoy Twitter without constantly hearing who doesn’t like their music or latest project; however, I thought Lampanelli’s joke was disrespectful to Black men and especially our President. Granted, I’m familiar with her work and I know she’s known for saying things along the line of “I’ve f*cked more Black guys than the LAPD”, but I still took offense to this particular joke.
About two hours pass and I’m sitting in the ER (not major; explanation here) waiting to do blood work. My boyfriend is in the lobby and I’m entertaining myself by reading Twitter. Lampanelli has now replied to my Tweets: “@sistertoldja I actually didn’t make this comment. I RT’d it from someone at a major newspaper. You’re forgiven, dick!” She then proceeds to say that I’m a humorless bitch and that I have “low status” in the biz (I don’t know if she confused me with someone else or simply assumed that I am a comic as well). She also peeped the name of my site and said it was ironic that I used the word “Beautiful”, considering that I was “ugly inside and out”.
This goddess right here said that I was ugly. On the outside. I’d like to pretend I’m mature enough to say her looks don’t matter here, but you can’t throw stones at from a house made of glass. I’m being kind and posting pics after her apparent recent makeover, but a quick Google search will make her choice of the word “ugly” even more….inappropriate.
The 49-year-old comedian made a point to say “Hey, check out @sistertoldja” before unleashing her tirade. She didn’t sound like a veteran comic, but instead, a little girl on the playground who got her feelings hurt. This, unsurprisingly, resulted in an hours long assault on my @ replies by her (surprisingly) rabid fans. Eager to get a RT from her, or perhaps a response, I had at least 100 replies from folks. Most were simply telling Lisa how funny she is and how lame I am. A disturbing number of White women chose to tell me I was jealous of the comic (a few implying that it’s because she’s taking all the good Black men; ironically, Lampanelli is married to a White man), as White men talked about my appearance (one offered to make me a wig of his pubic hair, as “you can’t tell the difference”; another seemed to think I was Lauryn Hill). Both Black and White fans pointed out Lampanelli’s ”love” of Black penis as some sort of evidence that she can’t be racist and one too many of our cousins seemed interested in laying across the woman’s feet to let their bellies keep her warm.
If you’ve followed me online for a while, you know that I am particularly irritable when it comes to stupidity. You don’t have to be a graduate of a good school to have a functioning brain, and this woman has some of the most simple-minded fans on the face of the earth. To fight the irrelevant battles of a celebrity- who was faced with the TERRIBLE insult of being told that a woman she doesn’t know from a can of paint didn’t think her joke was funny-one must be pretty lacking in valuable things with which to busy themselves. Lisa Lampanelli was trending last night as a result of this foolishness. What in the entire hell?
I replied to the comedian’s defense that she hadn’t originated the joke “So not only are YOU unfunny, but you have bad taste in other people’s jokes. All forgiven, bitch.” I’m not proud of using the b-word, but at this point, she’d called me out of my name a few times AND she called me ugly WHILE LOOKING LIKE THIS. I went on to say “What biz? I’m not a comedian. You, however, are. And you can’t handle criticism? You’re twice my age, that’s nothing new” , “So, we’ve learned that @LisaLampanelli is not only a subtle racist, but she’s far too sensitive to be a seasoned comedienne. Pathetic” and “And a 50+ woman bragging about her money? Um. And calling me ugly? Hilar. I’m prettier than she could ever buy. The end.”
Lampanelli has since deleted her offending Tweets and she attempted to apologize for turning her followers on me. But she did it in a really passive-aggressive ”I’m sorry, but it was your fault” sort of way, refused to acknowledge that people have the right to criticize her jokes and then basically said she was the bigger person, because she tried to apologize and I was still critical. If you have the time to sift through a significant portion of the whole mess, @DrGoddess captured a lot of it here (she, along with @JSmooth995 and@ThePBG were gracious enough to attempt a reasonable conversation with the comedian).
Ugh. This is longer than I intended. The whole exchange was totally unneeded. What really bothers me: the subtle insistence on the part of Lampanelli and some of her fans that I was some sort bully. This woman is older than me, far nastier with her language and she’s famous. Despite that, and the fact that she is significantly larger in size than I am, I was treated as if I was the big, intimidating bully by her and her fans. Classic racism: I’m a Black woman, so I am immediately threatening, unreasonable and unattractive. I’m also beneath her, which was made apparent from her very condescending ”apology” (she retweeted someone stating “the stupid bitch won’t get it” shortly afterwards).
I’ll continue not watching Lampanelli’s stand-up and I maintain my belief that she’s a failure at racial humor (she says she’s been mentioned in the same breath as Pryor…considering the caliber of her fans, I’m not surprised). She’s successful, as are many of the artists and performers that I reserve the right to dislike and criticize. I’m annoyed at her sensitivity and the lack of intellect displayed by both she and her followers who responded, but not surprised. The fact that the average American is less than whip smart, particularly as it relates to issues of race, is not news to me. I just hate that I had got dragged into such a silly situation for daring to make such a reasonable criticism. Lisa Lampanelli gets the 2011 Gas Face AND the Ralph Tresvant Award for Sensitivity. Fail.
Hack Comic that cant take a joke(or criticism) Wow.
My .02 cents.
Fighting on/over/through the internet is incredibly juvenile. She’s a comic. Whether she writes, steals, borrows or RTs a joke, she knows it’s a part of her job to have that joke scrutinized. It’s also incredibly classless of her to sick her flying Twitter monkeys out on anyone to do her bidding like the Wicked Witch of the West. Her first RT to you was fine, and her due. Her following juvenile, classless and immature tirade was unfortunate and uncalled for, to say the least.
As a fellow writer, who has worked hard to not allow my emotions control my writing, I will have to say that I can feel (and see through numerous typos) and see yours within this post. While I fully support your right to “write it all out”, doing so in a rather flustered manner is only showing Ms. Lampanelli (I’m not spell checking that, because I don’t give a shit if I’m spelling her name right or not) that she got to you.
There are no winners in internet fights, but this post does show she threw you for a loop during the scuff, and you’re much too classy and well-spoken a woman to allow anyone to see that.
Yikes!!! Lisa Lampanelli is generally as sensitive as sandpaper doused with itching powder, but who knew she had such rapid stans?!?! SMDH
I’m so happy this little altercation happened, if for nothing other than the fact that my brain had this ah ha moment and said wait, Lisa L is not funny or provocative. She sits in her realm of whiteness, never having realized the true position of “otherness” that she rips on. Then comparing herself to Pryor who only successfully navigated the difficulties of race through his comedy because he was living it. Sorry you had to be the lightning rod but it seems like Lisa’s fans that were among the intelligent may have now gained some insight into the mean spiritedness of her comedy, but we now know that some of her fans like her stuff because they actually are racist or homophobic or whatever. As a comedienne Lisa L has crossed the line of laughing with people to laughing at people, the line that shouldn’t be crossed in comedy.
I’m shocked at how she carried on but I shouldn’t be. I’ve only seen one of her shows on tv & watched her on a roast.
This just did it for me.
At first I thought she thought you were Sista Soulja. Then I realized she has access to Google and could have easily found out you weren’t one in the same. But, at the end of the day, in the minds of many no matter what, we (Black women) will always be seen as ‘less than’ in looks and intellect. While we all know the quick assumption isn’t true, it makes folks feel better to be able to put us in our places (places they’ve assigned and some of us refuse to acknowledge).
Ugh, she played herself with that exchange. The problem wasn’t the joke being funny or not (it wasn’t) BUT, this joke has been done before. We’ve all told unfunny jokes before. It happens. Move on and take the L. Also, most people can accept shock comedians who say outrageous things and her jokes about black men whatever doesn’t shock me BUT, for it to be a huge part of her routine, it becomes uncomfortable. It’s almost like she really is racist and using comedy as a way to get her words out w/o being challenged because she’s making a joke.
Oops! *rabid*
Leslie- It wasn’t emotion that caused me to forget to spell check, it was the fact that I was at the ER until 7am, got very little sleep and I’m doing two things at once. Thanks for reminding me to be more cautious!
this is the problem with the world. someone criticizes your weight and/or looks and it’s suddenly racist? i’m not standing up for by any means because what she originally said wasn’t right but you’re just as bad as her. blaming her white fans?? why does it have to be a white/black thing? if anything you come off as being racist by bringing up the white/black divide. i’m all for being proud of your heritage, etc. but there is a fine line between being proud and being racist.
regardless, you both came out looking wrong. you tossed insults right back at her just like she did you. nobody is coming out smelling like roses in this one. again, not standing up for her, just pretty insulted at the fact that just because someone insulted your weight or looks that it’s because you’re a black woman. to me, that’s ignorant.
so don’t throw stones about calling someone racist if you can’t look at your own words and see the same.
Woooooooow G! That is crazy! And really petty. But you know, she wouldn’t have to be so defensive if she weren’t so racist. People act like just because they retweet the racist comments of other, that their hands remain clean. That’s the convenience of denial, you can pretend that you don’t support these things, even though you are blatantly doing so by even sharing it with your followers.
And then to get on the looks factor?! Yeah, she definitely took it back to the playground. Besides, y’all not even in the same league and that is after she’s gotten cosmetic assistance! Damn, some white women sure don’t like to lose.
I had never heard of her until last night, but reading her TL, I realized she’s the kind of comic whose fans like her because in their minds, her rudeness, crudeness and racism somehow justifies their own. You, my little fireball, are in the business of truth-seeking and improvement of people’s lives. You win errrrytime. xxoo
For years Pops has been trying to convince me that she is hilarious. I never thought so. She reminds me of D.L. Hughley and Carlos Mencia — they aren’t really that funny so they rely on pedestrian racial jokes.
I hope a this gets a bit bigger so more people can see a different side of her.
this ugly old UNFUNNY heffa. she’s NEVER been funny to me and the fact that she’s this old and gets butthurt because someone said she isn’t funny…
and SHE called YOU ugly? *falls on the floor*
in my opinion, becoming famous for making mean spirited jokes doesn’t require much skill or intelligence on the part of the performer or fans, guess they proved me right.
@Sister Toldja No worries! And I certainly hope you are ok and catch up on your sleep.
I should also probably add that her automatic jump to “You so ugly…” humor in an effort to defend her “jokes” show how much swagger she has as a comic. It doesn’t surprise me in the least the equation of beauty according to race began to take shape in the entire debacle as soon as her followers chimed in. As Ms. Smart says above, we, as Black Women, will always be seen as less than or less attractive than our non-Black counterparts and jokes, in an effort to demean us, about our looks/hair/color/level of attractiveness will always be easy reaches for ad hominem attacks in times of debate.
I’ve never paid Lisa Lampawhatsherface any mind. Just no interest. This definitely seals it for me. However, I will always be a loyal reader of yours.
Having had the displeasure to sit through one of her shows, I have ignored her and don’t find her funny at all. If you think the material she does on Comedy Central Roasts is offensive, you haven’t seen anything. I was one of two black people at one of her shows in upstate NY and she immediately picked on me calling me “BoonKeisha” and saying how I can borrow one of her black men for a father figure since “Black kids don’t grow up with a dad”. I found her completely offensive and ultimately walked out with my white friends when she told me directly its good “you black women have all those abortions because it keeps crime low”. Don’t sweat her or her ridiculous followers. She is RACIST. Point blank period. And she doesn’t deserve to be brought up in intelligent conversation.
Until I read this post I have never heard of this comedian and I am glad. She is obviously tasteless and classless.
I will spread the word about her!
you know white folks get mad when blk folks don’t find their jokes funny. we’re the final stamp of approval. aside from her joke being awful and predictable, it’s like she was at a party doing the dougie and a group of blk kids walked in.
@Violet…OMG that chick would have had some issues had she come at me like that during a show. I know audience grilling is a part of a lot of comedian’s acts, but we would have had problems. i was on twitter last night and watched this exchange between Toldja and Lampa-whoever. That bitch didn’t apologize until some PR person told her too many racists idiots were speaking up for her. I wish there was a way we could tweet your experience to see if she will still pull the “Im not racist card”….
I AM IN SHOCK! I WILL NEVER GET USED TO THIS TYPE OF SHIT! NEVER! LORD HOLD ME
Peace to you. Peace for holding the high road and being a grown woman about yours. Whatever your trip to the Hospital was about, I hope that you never have issues with it again. God Bless, and dont feed the trolls.
1. Sister Toldja’s accurate pointing out of Lisa L’s racism was about her joke/tweet. And Lisa L’s protracted attack on Toldja was racist. Racism is exhibited differently by [white] men and women. You won’t see white men crossing the street when passing black guys or grabbing their purses in elevators. When white women want to be racist against black women, especially in verbal confrontations, the go-to plays are to call the black woman ugly, jealous, angry, bitter, and unable to get black men.
2. If you aren’t making excuses for her, and her followers, then what is the purpose of your comment? Because in the end, all you did was take a round-a-bout way of calling Sister Toldja a an immature juvenile racist. Just because your comment was not as vulgar as those of Lisa L’s twitter followers does not mean it did not do the same thing. And, frankly, someone who dares use juvenile insults opens themselves up to have those insults thrown back at them. If you want to criticize someone for deviating from the idealized body type, you open yourself up criticism for deviating from it. #ijs
3. Lisa L made it a black/white thing. Her fans did too. Even if some of the ignorant twitterers attacking Toldja online were black, they were using racist tropes to do so. Please believe a lot of people – white people especially – take umbrage with a black person daring to criticize a white person. The accurate criticism is seen in the eyes of some as invalid simply because it came from a black person.
4. Pointing out racism is not the same as committing racism. To attempt that these acts are equivalent is mendacious and promotes further racism.
5. It is a known derailing tactic of whites, who get their feelings hurt, to turn around and accuse blacks of being racist when the black people are calling out or reacting to racism. The purpose is not to end racism, but to silence black people. It serves no purpose other than to muddy the argument and take the focus off the racist action on put it on the justified reaction to racism. If there were no racist act, there would be no reaction to said act, which leads to me to my final point…
6. How presumptuous it is for white people to dictate how blacks (and other racial minorities in the US) to react to racism. Racism is a violent act. Reactions to it are – and should be – violent. That whole turn the other cheek, don’t make any waves, just hope and pray white people suddenly have a change a heart does nothing but serve the racist status quo. Oppressors (and those who benefit from the oppression of others, even indirectly) don’t stop being oppressors until there are consequences for doing so. Being they economic, social, or personal consequences. And before you trot out Dr. Martin Luther King, let me remind you that his calls for non-violence were more about showing the inhumanity of the US and its racist practices (jailing, beating, and killing people who did nothing more than sit in a restaurant or ride a bus) than some kumbayah sentiments. Things like marches and boycotts hit the pockets of racists, who were forced to see that holding on to such policies would lighten their pockets. And even then, there was violent racist opposition to laws and mandates to overthrow that system (or parts of it). AND THAT STILL DID NOT CHANGE THE HEARTS AND MINDS OF WHITE AMERICA AT LARGE. Overt racism went covert, and the game kept on.
@ Violet:
OMG! It would’ve taken every fiber of my being to not put the beats on her fat, sloppy ass.
@ Toldja:
I saw the exchange between you and her stans. Pathetic. They were riding hard for her too. You’d think she was paying them to defend her the way they were behaving.
“she’s been mentioned in the same breath as Pryor” – I believe. She sucks and Pryor doesnt
Be On It captured everything that i wanted to say
i got on the following morning and Dr. Goddess posted part of the exchange.
Lisa L is wack and her stand up is stale to be honest. if you remove race from her stand up, she has no jokes at all.
her fans don’t surprise me either
*roots for Toldja
sh*t happens, especially on the interwebs…I’ve felt the burn of people’s sensitivity and know the sensation all too well.
Lisa Lameness just gave you another platform…#holla
wow – I have always (excuse the harsh language) hated her. A friend of mine knew her before her rise and put me on to her.
After watching, the only reason I could think that she was able to get away with this from the black people in attendance was because she was a huge white woman dressed in tutu dress with loud ass colors (as she used to dress for her stand up premakeover/fame) – in effect, she was dressed as a clown so the audience didn’t take her seriously. I also think, shamefully, that she received a pass from the black men in the audience BECAUSE she goes out of her way to praise their sexual prowess often – in between insulting them, black women and the black family. (And all people of color.)
This is a case in point – all racism, no matter how harmless or funny people make it out to seem, masks a dangerous vitriol that, as we see here, can be released at will in the most harmful way.
I understand your inability to respond without negative language and stand with you in the face of hatred.
married to a white man huh? smh.
You are welcome to your opinion on Lisa and her humor/”humor” (I have my own issues with her), and her fans’ comments are infuriating, but I definitely feel like you could have come off better by avoiding repeated jabs at LL’s physical appearance/weight in this blog post. Intersectionality exists, after all. You take Lisa to task here for being a cry-baby and fighting you with third-grade playground insults, but your retaliation here still cuts deep for the wrong reasons.
This post sounds like a perfect example of Classy vs. Trashy. Racism is ugly; along with its supporters and promoters. Classy should never entertain Trashy.
Wow, using your fanbase to make someone feel bad for criticising an unfunny, racist joke – that’s remarkably low, especially when ganging up is really something people should grow out of forty years sooner than she hasn’t.
Also since it was mentioned I checked your bio picture, and you are really stunning. (I really hope that doesn’t sound like a token “Aw, don’t mind her,” it’s not at all.)
(Also sorry if it’s strange to comment on your blog as a stranger! I found this post through Womanist Musings, and thinking complimentary things and not saying them always feels a bit of a waste.)
great post…. @Be on it, your post said it all for me, thank you….
Jam and everyone else, thanx for helping me NOT be the only one that does not find Lisa L’s shtick remotely funny…..and thanx for the heads up on her marital status……in the mindset of Mrs Lisa L., “her husband must be hung like a black guy.”
Bravo! You did an excellent job defending yourself. YOU’RE beautiful inside and out and that raggedy a** comic is NOT. She’s a racist and her followers are DUMB as f**k. This is why I can’t get with Twitter…so much stupid ish.
@Be On it
Point #6 is absolutely excellent.
Not only are you right with your criticism, you also rock for this one: “2011 Gas Face AND the Ralph Tresvant Award for Sensitivity. Fail.”