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Dirty Pop Culture, Feminist Fight, Life and Times of Sister Toldja

The Death of Sister Toldja

5 Comments 19 October 2011

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Sister Toldja is dead. Long live Jamilah Lemieux (hopefully).

Dirty Pop Culture

The Worst Song Ever, Perhaps Definitely

5 Comments 10 October 2011

There's bad music. There's very bad music. And then, in the winner's circle of losing, there's "Hard" by Will.I.Am, featuring Jennifer Lopez and Mick Jagger.

Dirty Pop Culture, Race Matters

Rihanna Goes Incognegro For British Vogue

6 Comments 03 October 2011

Hate her or love her, Rihanna’s on top. As a former Rih Rih ‘hater’ (it’s not my fault she could not sing at all until, like, yesterday) who was semi-won over by her smart-ass wit and a few major jams on her last two albums, I’m rooting for her. She’s fun! They push the ‘sexy, sexy, [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

Tuesday Tirade

6 Comments 27 September 2011

Happy Tuesday! Sike. Happy days start with “S” or holiday names, amirite? Oh well. Happy ‘another day on this planet’. I hope you are all well. I’m still exhausted from my trip home last week, but I’m glad I went. I have a few peeves I’d like to rant about if you’ll be so kind [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus

Take Your Time

1 Comment 22 September 2011

I had two separate conversations with my girlfriends this weekend about how undeniably wrong we were in our younger days about what adulthood would look like. If you had told us in high school that you don�t have to be married with children by your late 20s, that you still might want to hit the [...]

Dirty Pop Culture

The Cult of Cyber Cynicism and Hate

2 Comments 21 September 2011

I cannot say often enough how grateful I am for the development of social media, which has allowed us to connect with people from across the planet via the internet. However, for all the wonderful things to emerge from these cyber kinships, some of the darkest truths about humanity also make themselves far plainer now [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus, Race Matters

The White Guy Thing Again?

64 Comments 10 August 2010

NOTE: This post was originally published on 12.30.2009. It ran again after this Washington Post article last year and it seems appropriate once again in light of this recent WSJ article written by, of all people, a Black man who is married to a Black woman, that suggests sisters should take their talents to White men. Single [...]

Feminist Fight, Politics/Politricks, You Shoulda Been There

Support Kevin Powell for Congress

7 Comments 29 July 2010

I would like to urge everyone-particularly my fellow residents of Brooklyn's 10th Congressional District-to check out Kevin's website and consider donating or getting involved with the campaign.

Mars/Venus

“And The Brother Said” Vol. 1 f/Phonte Coleman

56 Comments 02 June 2010

As I promised last week, I will occasionally be giving the floor to up to some of my favorite brothers to let them give some male perspectives on dating, romance and other topics of the day. The first edition of “And the Brother Said” features the homey Phonte. Most of you know him as a [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus

Love and Marriage

9 Comments 22 June 2010

Taking a break from the Feminism series for a spell. It’s much needed, I’d say. If you missed part one and part two, please take a second to check them out. Part three was linked at The Fresh Xpress and my Clutch feature for this week is “Why Feminism?”, a brief rundown of why I [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Pure Comedy, Race Matters, Reviews

A �Pause� For The Cause

48 Comments 24 June 2010

Aaron McGruder takes on both Tyler Perry and the "pause"/"no homo" phenomenon in one fell swoop. Brilliant. Hilarious. And, most of all, courageous.

Dirty Pop Culture, Fine Arts, Life and Times of Sister Toldja

On Michael, With Love

18 Comments 25 June 2010

There is so much interesting cultural commentary that can be culled from Michael's life, his death and his legacy. However, I'm not the one who's gonna make those observations. At least not right now. My views on Michael are very much emotional. I'm too focused on my attachment to him as one of my first crushes and one of my favoritest people I ever did see to have an intellectual interest in him yet. I just wanna love him.

Feminist Fight

Redemption Song?

46 Comments 28 June 2010

Folks all across Negronia and beyond tuned into last night’s BET Awards in anticipation of the network’s second attempt at a Michael Jackson tribute. I didn’t watch live because, well, I ain’t got cable. I am convinced that having access to so much television would make me lazy. And also, I’m poor. In anticipation of [...]

Feminist Fight, Mars/Venus, Race Matters

To Have and To Hold Down- Pt. 1

35 Comments 30 June 2010

We want to love our brothers, we think we love our brothers...but sometimes, we just don't know how to do it.

Feminist Fight, Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus, Race Matters

To Have and To Hold Down- Pt. 2

33 Comments 01 July 2010

This is why there is a site in the first place. This is why I write.

Let�s Talk About Sex, Mars/Venus

Let�s Wait A While

39 Comments 06 July 2010

You know what's sexy? Sex. What's not? Creepy text messages.

Fine Arts, Reviews

Get With This: B*tch Is The New Black

22 Comments 08 July 2010

It took me a long time to review of B*tch Is The New Black because I couldnt bring myself finish the book...

Fine Arts, Race Matters, You Should Be Here

Elsewhere Today.

0 Comments 09 July 2010

Sorry that there was no new post here today, but I have three articles elsewhere on the web today: How Much Was Oscar Grant’s Life Worth? (via Essence Online) Chicago’s Response to Overturned Gun Ban (also, via Essence Online) You Know I Had Soul (via Soul Train) If you are heading to the Brooklyn Hip-Hop [...]

Feminist Fight, Race Matters

B*tch, Please?

19 Comments 12 July 2010

The biggest problem with b*tch is that there is no universally accepted definition.

Feminist Fight, Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Race Matters

Happy Black Girl Day: July 2010 Edition

6 Comments 14 July 2010

**I am going to be a guest on Abiola Abrams’ LSD: Love, Sex and Dating tonight at 10pm EST! You can watch it live at Shovio.com! I will also be Tweeting a bunch throughout. Please join us!** Happy Black Girl Day! (What’s that? Click here for answers!) My theme for HBGD this month is gratitude. [...]

Feminist Fight, Mars/Venus

Guest Post: How Feminism Did NOT Kill My Sexy

29 Comments 15 July 2010

"Feminism has gifted me the quite pleasurable experience of being able to date smart, kind, and thoughtful men and enjoy them sexually and intellectually. But the sexy part? That was all me."

Reviews

Get With This: Mixed Chicks

26 Comments 19 July 2010

My hair is…special. It’s about 10 different textures at any given moment and I’m growing out my hair color, so that I might ruin it again with a new color in the future. A wrong turn in the hair aisle can take me from early-Kelis wild to DeBarge drippy. So when I recieved a pitch [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

Growing Pains

16 Comments 20 July 2010

I'm either going to keep rolling with the age I turned in 2008 for another year or take on my 2009 one. But this 2010 one? Oh no, hell no.

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

Conversations With Mother Toldja

18 Comments 23 July 2010

Mom: You just don't understand. I was fabulous.

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

A Modest Proposal

19 Comments 27 July 2010

Someone hit me up not too long ago and asked "Are you blogging full time?" Unfortunately, this isn't the case.

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus

The Second Worst I Ever Had

24 Comments 28 July 2010

As we left off yesterday, I found myself chatting up a dude in the mall who wasn’t really my type of hype. To recap: neck tattoo, tight Armani Exchange threads, Drake ringtone= the three strikes that SHOULD have put him out. But no, silly little me keeps on going. Now, this fella is a chef [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Let�s Talk About Sex, Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Politics/Politricks, Pure Comedy

Friday Foolery

6 Comments 30 July 2010

Some people should make a comeback, but others need to stay gone so that I might preserve the image I had of them in my heart.

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus

Dating Game: He Said, I Listened

25 Comments 03 August 2010

Not long ago, I met a fella that I found to be dope. I wont give you details because 1) God forbid he Googled me and found the site (if so, can you please stop reading right now? Please? and 2)there are perhaps three men who could be reading this and thinking “Is this about [...]

Feminist Fight

After The Dance

15 Comments 02 August 2010

There seems to be a widespread societal belief that women who work in these establishments are all �hoes with daddy issues�.

Fine Arts, You Should Be Here

Get With This: FREE CANDY

4 Comments 04 August 2010

Not long before I moved to Brooklyn, I got word of a fellow Chicago native and Howard alum who was attempting to open up a performance space in Fort Greene. Todd Triplett fought a long, tough battle, but the venue was seized by the city through Eminent Domain...

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus

Return Of The Mack

104 Comments 09 August 2010

Can I tell you that I was the recipient of some grade-A mack game this weekend? And I couldn't be any happier!

Preserve The Pretty

Guest Post: Why You Should Encourage Little Girls To Play Sports

17 Comments 10 August 2010

"I set out to find a black female workout partner who is around my age. I figured I�d start some activities and naturally meet some black girls along the way. Needless to say, that hasn�t happened..."

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

Happy Black Girl Day 8/10: My Sister’s Kept One

17 Comments 11 August 2010

Happy Black Girl Day! This month, I want to salute someone very special to me: my eldest sister, Sister OGSB (yes, I am rude enough to use an inside joke nickname on the internet and not define it…what? She’s my sister, I’m not gonna tell all our secrets!) Yesterday was her birthday and it seems [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Pure Comedy, Race Matters

Five For Friday: Afro-Twitter Revolution

11 Comments 13 August 2010

We just would like to continue living, loving and laughing without being othered by random strangers...but can we have an Afro-Twitter family reunion?

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus

Stop Wasting My Free Text Messages

19 Comments 16 August 2010

Recently, I have found myself constantly in and out of text message conversations with a young man who I met recently...but he hasn't made a move to actually plan anything or suggest a date or even made a vague suggestion about hanging out. But he seems to want to chat with me all the time.

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Love For Sale

The Twitter/Blogging Comment Problem

72 Comments 17 August 2010

I take what I do and my brand (yes, the dreaded B-word) seriously. I hope that you respect that. If it isn't for you, no love lost...

Dirty Pop Culture, Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Politics/Politricks, Race Matters

On Lauryn, Proposition 8 and That Mosque Situation

4 Comments 18 August 2010

Fam-a-lam! No entirely new content here today, but if I may, I want to call your attention to something I am *really* excited about. I had the opportunity to screen BET’s first ever music documentary “My Mic Sounds Nice: A Truth About Women In Hip-Hop” last week and it literally brought me to tears. I [...]

Dirty Pop Culture

Take It This Far

17 Comments 23 August 2010

...even with the fact that the mainstream embrace of pieces and shades of the culutre is almost as old as I am...I don't want to see little suburban 'tweens on TV rapping, dressed like fake trap boys circa 1999.

Dirty Pop Culture, Race Matters

The Power of No Forgiveness

14 Comments 24 August 2010

The path to this fabled "Post-Racial America" will not be paved with empty apologies and forgiveness that comes with no requirements.

Politics/Politricks, Race Matters

Just Another Case of That Old DEA

15 Comments 25 August 2010

When we are looking at a place with as a large Black population as Atlanta and the number of persons being investigated who will be Black and male...you are telling me you don't employ nine folks who speak the language of the 'trap?

Dirty Pop Culture, Feminist Fight, Fine Arts, Reviews

Get With This: My Mic Sounds Nice

7 Comments 26 August 2010

We've been asking to see work like My Mic Sounds Nice for years and we have to make sure that we support it if we want to see more

Dirty Pop Culture, Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Race Matters

Live From The Color Complex, Part 1

65 Comments 30 August 2010

Dear readers, what have been YOUR experiences with color? When were you first made aware of the concept? Have you been hurt or challenged by matters of skin tone and if so, how? Unpack your bags and let's rap

You Should Be Here

Get With This: 365 Girl

2 Comments 01 September 2010

(Today’s regularly scheduled post will appear a little later on.-ST) Hey! For those of you who work with or have a personal relationship with young women between the ages of 10-17, consider checking out Tracey Hawkins-Sydnor’s book 365 Girl: “365 Girl is an immediate call to action on raising the self esteem of young ladies. [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus, You Should Be Here

Merci Beaucoup!

2 Comments 01 September 2010

(If you missed the earlier post today, check it out here! Great information for those of you who work with girls ages 10-17!-ST) Hip-Hop hooray, I won a Black Weblog Awardfor Best Microblog (my Twitter page)! Thank you so much to those who voted. What makes this a whole lot cooler than when I won in [...]

Race Matters

Say No Go: Big Shots Bar and Grill

25 Comments 03 September 2010

Happy Friday, folks! If you are looking for a place to go grab a drink this weekend, make sure it ISN’T Big Shots Bar and Grill in Woodbridge, NJ. Apparently, they aren’t a big fan of Colored men. My friend Andre Melvin Jones, Jr. had a nasty experience there. Check his words out below and [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, You Should Be Here

Get With This: One Night In Vegas

6 Comments 06 September 2010

"People looked at Mike and 'Pac like superheroes. The reality is they were mortals. (In the film) we see that side of them..."

Feminist Fight, Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Race Matters

Happy Black Girl Day 9/10: Feelin’ Good

8 Comments 08 September 2010

Friendship makes me a Happy Black Girl.

Feminist Fight, Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus

Embracing Feminism and the Pleasure of Pleasing

20 Comments 13 September 2010

(I have a new piece up at Clutch today: “A New Big Sisterhood”. Check it out!-ST) I get asked pretty often how I reconcile my feminist beliefs with my relationship to men. Typically, this is in reference to the fact that I routinely engage in heteronormative relationships with men and that I fit the construct [...]

Politics/Politricks, Race Matters

Yet Another Poison Going On

11 Comments 14 September 2010

(If you get a chance to check it out, I had a piece up yesterday at Essence.com: “Why I Am A Fierce Black Woman”. Let me know what you think!-ST) I had originally intended to participate in the protest that was to take place in Lower Manhattan on September 11th in support of both the constriction [...]

Feminist Fight, Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Race Matters

Week In Review

1 Comment 17 September 2010

No new post today, but here's a quick round-up of my work here and elsewhere this past week...

Dirty Pop Culture, Feminist Fight

She Never Asked For It

31 Comments 21 September 2010

Yes, Sainz had on a �sexy� outfit and yes, her credentials as a �serious� sports journalist may be questionable...

You Should Be Here

Get With This- FreeCandy: The Musical Fundraiser

1 Comment 22 September 2010

My good friend/fellow Howard alum Todd Triplett has been working tirelessly to bring an art/performance venue- FreeCandy- to the Clinton Hill neighborhood in Brooklyn. If you missed it, I did a writeup about his efforts for The Beautiful Struggler (check that right here). I’m proud to be on the host committee for a dope [...]

Feminist Fight, Race Matters

Why “No Wedding, No Womb” Doesn’t Work

80 Comments 23 September 2010

Yesterday, writer Christelyn Denise Karazin launched the No Wedding, No Womb movement, which is designed to encourage Black women to avoid out of wedlock pregnancies. Predictably, the internet went a little nuts on NWNW. From my Twitter stream, I only saw one person who seemed to support Karazin’s efforts (this is not to reduce the amount of [...]

Feminist Fight

Free Herself

37 Comments 28 September 2010

Once we accept that women aren't baby machines, their wombs are not the treasure chests storing their value, nor their virtue and that as human beings, we have sexual urges and desires...we'll all breathe a little easier.

Race Matters

Negronia vs. The Gay

28 Comments 04 October 2010

So, yeah. Once again we find that not only is Negronia talking about it's issues with The Gays, but folks outside are too...

Feminist Fight, Mars/Venus

Case In Point

48 Comments 06 October 2010

If you haven’t had a chance to check it out, my piece over at Clutch this week- Nobody Smilin’- takes on the annoying predilection of men to tell a woman in the street that she needs to smile: “Even if no harm is intended, I find something inherently wrong with a brother essentially ordering a [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus

Simpin’ Ain’t Easy

19 Comments 11 October 2010

**Wednesday 10/13 is Happy Black Girl Day! Tell a friend to tell a friend!** Man, can I tell you something? When I hear stories of women losing their sh*t over a man who clearly doesn’t want them, I be looking at them all types of crazy. Luckily, I don’t observe much of this with my inner [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Feminist Fight, Race Matters

He’s Right, But It’s Not Okay.

12 Comments 14 October 2010

"I was being singled out. And I felt like, is it because of the color of my skin? Is it because that, you're paying more attention? Is it because there's certain rappers that do and say the same things that I'm saying. And I don't hear no one saying anything about that. I didn't just invent saying offensive things"... I don't think Eminem is incorrect here.

Feminist Fight, Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus

Let’s Talk About Sex Positive: And Doing It Well

6 Comments 16 October 2010

**This post originally appeared on November 5, 2009** After a few very heavy days of unpacking pain and engaging pathologies as they pertain to sex, it seems high time to deal with what SHOULD be the fun part: the sex! We’ve all had “Better Than No Sex” sex or “That Wasn’t Worth The Hours Of [...]

Feminist Fight, Let�s Talk About Sex, Mars/Venus

You Ain’t Gettin’ None

12 Comments 16 October 2010

*Inspired by this right here and the all around awesomeness that is Jacylyn Friedman.* I deeply want to eradicate any language that describes sex as an act that is given by a woman to a man: Are you gonna let him hit? Should I give him some? She gave it up last night, dog. Rather, [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Race Matters

‘Mad At’ Monday

14 Comments 18 October 2010

Colored people, I am mad at you. Here's why...

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus

Death of the Cool

16 Comments 22 October 2010

Warning: today’s post is not only heteronormative and from an extremely limited worldview, it may just qualify as downright silly. I’m not even going to pretend like it aint. Okay? Aiight. For as long as I can remember, I have been referred by men to as “the cool girl”. I am, as it relates to [...]

Mars/Venus

Tell Me What I Need To Hear

15 Comments 26 October 2010

I have found, through experience and observation, that there are a lot of men who would prefer to go ghost than to tell a young lady what she needs to hear as it relates to his disinterest in her. You may have went through it before: a couple of months of dating, everything seems ‘cool [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Race Matters

Who’s That Peepin’ In Our Window?

14 Comments 27 October 2010

Where is White in America? I want to know about some real White folks- the ones sipping Sunny Delite and gin cocktails at NASCAR games and feeding their kids on food stamps. I’m tired of all these upwardly mobile, sanitized yuppies on TV. Or some White people with a farm, like the ones Shirley Sherrod helped, y’know? [...]

Mars/Venus

You, Me And She

15 Comments 01 November 2010

Full disclosure: while I’ve had some great, meaningful relationships, there is no one ex-boyfriend or former flame who lives in my heart forever and always to cast a pallor over new romances or to be the model to which all subsequent partners are compared. My ex-boyfriend and I are cordial, but you won’t catch us [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

Lawd, Lawd, Lawd

28 Comments 03 November 2010

I’m doing way too much right now and not enough at the same time. I feel like a loser. Am I ever going to make a living? As it stands right now, I should be ‘down at the welfare’. I’m emotionaly rich right now, so I shouldn’t complain. I just wish I could find a way [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Feminist Fight, Race Matters

Tommorrow: Emergency Happy Black Girl Day!

25 Comments 04 November 2010

In the words of ‘Pac: “It’s gonna be some stuff you gonna see that’s gonna make it hard for you to smile in the future”. And by some stuff, I mean Tyler Perry Presents “For Colored Girls Who Had Not YET Considered Suicide, But Then They Saw This Movie”. I screened it last night and [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

Happy Black Girl Day: November 2010 Edition

29 Comments 10 November 2010

Today, I am three days old. That may be a little confusing, as most of you know that I am twenty-secret years old in Earthly terms. But today, you see, I am three days old in a sisterhood like no other. I am three days old as a member of the FIRST and FINEST sorority [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Fine Arts, Race Matters, You Should Be Here

Emergency HBGD: Black Girls Rock!

3 Comments 05 November 2010

Since we might really be in need of something Black, female and uplifting right about now, I’d like to introduce you all to BLACK GIRLS ROCK!, the brainchild of DJ/model/all around cool chick Beverly Bond. This should make you feel good, Colored girls. “BLACK GIRLS ROCK! Inc. is 501(c)3 non-profit youth empowerment and mentoring organization established to [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus

Let’s Not Play The Game

17 Comments 09 November 2010

A few weeks ago, my gentleman friend’s mother explained to his 7-year-old niece that I would be joining the family for Thanksgiving this year. Her words: “Your uncle is bringing his new girlfriend to meet us.” Upon hearing this (and his niece’s precocious adorable kid response) he reminded his mom that we weren’t officially boyfriend/girlfriend [...]

Feminist Fight, Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus

About This Boyfriend Thing…

22 Comments 15 November 2010

So, I mentioned last week that I have a boyfriend now. It’s funny that I was inclined to drop that information, as I don’t necessarily put all my personal business on the internet. I mean, who really wants to hear all about my life? It’s somewhat normal, you know. In fact, I had an entire [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Mars/Venus, Race Matters

Guest Post-What Are “We” Saying

27 Comments 16 November 2010

Today’s post is from a dear friend of mine, Brother VSOP (named as such because he’s from Detroit and thus, he drinks cognac, he’s very special and because I’m not as good as coming up with Brother/Sister names as I used to be). He’s a great young brother with some really interesting ideas about race and [...]

Feminist Fight, Mars/Venus, Race Matters

The Participant Ribbon

29 Comments 18 November 2010

“All y’all are ready to hop up and talk bad when a brother is messing up, but nobody has anything to say when he’s doing the right thing.” How many times have you heard this in some form or fashion? It sounds good, as far as reactionary rhetoric goes. There’s a modicum of validity there- [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Feminist Fight, Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus, Race Matters

Week In Review

0 Comments 19 November 2010

TGIF swag on a hundred, thousand, trillion! For all my fellow ‘living for the weekend’ warriors, I hope you are as excited for this two day pre-holiday break as I am. Thank you for your patience as I work my way back to a regular posting schedule after a little break. In case you missed [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Politics/Politricks, Race Matters

Culture Matters

11 Comments 29 November 2010

Every so often, someone will attempt to fry me (or another writer) up for writing about pop culture or social commentary, as opposed to politics or poverty or something more seemingly consequential. I actually went on a first date about 5 or 6 months ago with a young man who told me that I was [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Feminist Fight, Mars/Venus

Heal Yourself Elsewhere

29 Comments 22 November 2010

I have decided to keep my comments about Tyler Perry to a minimum from this point on because I feel my life has been on a downward spiral since I did the NPR piece about him: I can’t find a new gig, I ain’t got no money…I’m afraid if he finds out I have a [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus

Dear Mama

12 Comments 24 November 2010

By the time you read this, I will have met my boyfriend’s mother for the first time. Just typing that made my heart race a little bit. As a lifelong dazzler and charmer of people (particularly of women my own mother’s age and my friend’s parents), I know that history is on my side. People [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Politics/Politricks, Race Matters

After The Chocolate

18 Comments 26 November 2010

I’m back in the DC area for the first time in a while and every time I return, I’m a bit overwhelmed with the changes. I moved here from Chicago in 2002 and stayed for about 5 years; for those of you who remember Chocolate City 8 years ago (or even when I left in [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Feminist Fight

That Ain’t It: Keri Hilson

35 Comments 30 November 2010

Oh, Keri, girl. You need a Sprite? ‘Cause you’re looking kinda thirsty right now. I know record sales aren’t much these days, and that having a wild gimmick or a little controversy seems like a great way to drum up some interest in your work. And we know that sex sells and that R&B music [...]

Feminist Fight, Mars/Venus

Real Talk, Wrong Talk

11 Comments 02 December 2010

There is a seemingly fine line between inept macking and having some sexist thoughts or tendencies. The way that many men approach us women can create an immediate distaste or feeling of resentment. No one likes feeling like prey, or as if they are auditioning for a sexual role they have no interest in playing. [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Feminist Fight

Of Geese, Gander and Explict Music Videos

22 Comments 06 December 2010

Those of you who read the site last week know just where I stand when it comes to Keri Hilson’s latest video, but as the lovely District Diva pointed out to me yesterday, I didn’t say anything about Raheem Devaughn’s equally controversial and provacative clip for “She’s Single”. Why is it that the same folks [...]

Feminist Fight, Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus

Happy Black Girl Day: December 2010 Edition

15 Comments 08 December 2010

Happy Black Girl Day everyone! It’s the final one for the year and I hope that all the sisters and friends of sisters out there take the time to celebrate one last time in 2010. When I spoke to DC District Diva last weekend, I shared with her some of my hopes and plans for [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Feminist Fight, Mars/Venus, Politics/Politricks

Elizabeth Edwards: Grace and Resilience

6 Comments 09 December 2010

The story of Elizabeth Edwards � specifically, her illness, her husband’s infidelity with a particularly insensitive mistress and her recent passing- touched many women across socioeconomic and color lines. I’d say with great confidence that many of those who were moved by her passing knew very little of Edwards’ life outside of cancer and adultery; [...]

Race Matters

A Long Dark Song

11 Comments 13 December 2010

Last week, sources close to the case revealed that Bishop Eddie Long is close to settling out of court with four men who accused him of inappropriate sexual relations in a civil suit earlier this year. “This stunning news counters Bishop Long�s public declaration to his congregation at New Birth Missionary Baptist Church in Lithonia, Ga., that he [...]

Dirty Pop Culture

Support Jabari Smith For “Paradise Hunter”!

3 Comments 14 December 2010

Jabari Smith, one of my fellow Howard University graduates is in the running for a VERY cool position as the host of the “Paradise Hunter” travel/adventure series and would appreciate your support! Check this out from the official press release: Paradise Hunter Announces Top 40 Applicants for Travel TV Show Host Search Competition Paradise Hunter’s [...]

Race Matters

More Than A River In Egypt, Part 1

23 Comments 15 December 2010

I had an article published on Clutch this week in which I mused the ways in which Black Americans categorize women as “exotic” versus “regular”; in this article, I also discuss how these labels are used by our men, fetishes and how Black women who look more “exotic” are still considered to be at a [...]

Race Matters

Time Takes On ‘Passing As Black’, Fails

16 Comments 17 December 2010

I’d like to table the discussion over this and that until Monday. For just once in my life, I’m going to follow the words of Sarah Palin and not “retreat” but “reload”. Since a few of the comments suggested that I wasn’t concise, clear or respectful enough, I’m going to make sure my next piece [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Race Matters

A Complex Ain�t Simple

16 Comments 20 December 2010

When there is a conversation over beauty and/or preferences, the most frustrating responses I hear are along the lines of “Well, why do you care what someone else thinks about you?”, “You can’t worry about a man who don’t want you anyway!” and “Talking about this stuff just keeps us divided!” Here are a few [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

Click And Read

6 Comments 22 December 2010

How’s your holiday coming so far? I’m all the way over it. I have no money for presents or to take advantage of these great winter sales or to even get myself a warm enough coat or some boots to keep my feet from turning to ice and I’m feeling no pre-Kwanzaa spirit. Yadda, yadda, blessings, [...]

Dirty Pop Culture

Fly Away

9 Comments 24 December 2010

You know what I hate? Well, if you’re a regular reader, you might rightly answer “A whole lotta stuff”. But today, specifically, I hate club flyers (or ‘pluggers’, as we call them in the Chi). I hate them for a few reasons. Press pause: if you are gonna get riled up and presume that I’m [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Race Matters

Why Kwanzaa?

7 Comments 27 December 2010

Habari Gani! If your childhood was as righteous, Asiatic and Nubian as mine, then you know the proper response today is “Kujichagulia Habari Gani.” But since more Black folks grew up knowing the words to “The Star Spangled Banner” than the Nguzo Saba, I’ll give you a pass on that. However, Kwanzaa is for me [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Mars/Venus, Race Matters

Thug Appeal

13 Comments 03 January 2011

There has been a common misnomer for years amongst disgruntled and usually socially inept and/or otherwise unattractive brothers that ‘all Black women want a thug’. This is not true. This could not be farther from the truth. If you don’t believe me, hop in the Delorean and watch single Toldja interact with thugs (real or [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Feminist Fight, Mars/Venus

YOU Can’t Tell Me Nothing

25 Comments 05 January 2011

A few weeks ago, I did a satirical piece for Clutch from the perspective of �Cleonte Jones�, a relationship expert with questionable credentials. It was in the spirit of laughs and giggles, but aint nothing funny about the fact that Black women seem to be both expected to and somewhat willing to let all types [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Preserve The Pretty

New Year: New Me, New You

9 Comments 10 January 2011

Every January, people across the globe make New Year’s resolutions to change this, start that…only to let themselves down or to forget about their vow all together. Present company included. However, I have still decided to commit myself to a few important adjustments in my life and I actually feel confident in my ability to [...]

Feminist Fight, Race Matters

Happy Black Girl Day: January 2011 Edition

7 Comments 12 January 2011

Whoop whoop! It’s the first Happy Black Girl Day for the new year! It’s the perfect time to make some resolutions that can help us all work on being Happy Black Girls more of the 365 days this year than not. I’ll kick us off with a few and I want you to add some! [...]

Dirty Pop Culture

T-Pain Launches “Booty Symphony”; Toldja Weeps

21 Comments 18 January 2011

Like many bloggers, I get a lot of unsolicited pitches from PR companies for me to cover stories, product releases or events that have absolutely nothing to do with the content of my site. While I have done product reviews (and plan to do more), most of the things that come my way don’t fit [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Feminist Fight, Mars/Venus

I Hate You. Come Closer.

35 Comments 20 January 2011

Why do men hate “hoes”, yet spend so much time, energy and even money trying to keep them near? What is the fascination with attacking a woman for her sexual behavior and why does a woman who draws so much ire from a man also command his desire? See, when I dislike someone, I don’t [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

I Went On An Adventure!

17 Comments 25 January 2011

Sorry for the lack of postage yesterday. The Toldjatop done got hit with a virus, y’all. Let us pray for her speedy recovery. She has already survived the removal of the 3, 5 and 6 keys by my cat, so I know she’s a fighter. Amen. Let me tell you what me and The Beau [...]

Feminist Fight, Mars/Venus, Race Matters

Too Hot To Handle, Too Cold To Smile?

30 Comments 28 January 2011

(NOTE: I will be a guest on T. Tyler Talks tonight at 10pm EST! The show runs from 9-11pm and you can listen in here.) I am a big fan of Very Smart Brothas- both the site and the two gents (and a lady!) who made it happen. Like with most folks, they’ve said things [...]

Feminist Fight, Mars/Venus, Race Matters

Nobody Smiling v 2.0

33 Comments 31 January 2011

In my last post, I mentioned a comment that The Champ made over at VSB in regards to Black women making tons of ‘excuses’ as to why we walk down the street with a blank look, mean mug or some other physical ‘Don’t bother me’ cue written all over their faces. I also took this [...]

Feminist Fight, Let�s Talk About Sex, Race Matters

The Attack On Black Women�s Choice (Part 2)

18 Comments 03 February 2011

“I�ve been made aware of the national call to Sisters to abandon birth control… to picket family-planning centers and abortion-referral groups and to raise revolutionaries. What plans do you have for the care of me and my child?�-Toni Cade Bambara The last post took a look at the life of Margaret Sanger, the woman who’s [...]

Feminist Fight, Race Matters

Happy Black Girl Day: February 2011 Edition

2 Comments 09 February 2011

Yay! The happiest day of the month…well, at least it tries to be…is here. For those who are unfamiliar, click here for an explanation of HBGD. Yay! My goal for this month is to get folks interested in participating next month and the subsequent months to follow. I’m aiming to have at least 10 bloggers [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Feminist Fight

Killer Curves

11 Comments 14 February 2011

Happy Valentine’s Day! I wrote about this lil’ day over at the Clutch mag, so I won’t say much about it here. Hope yours is as special as you wish for and if it isn’t, crap, it’s just a day. Get an ice cream cone after work and watch a good movie. Next thing you know, [...]

Mars/Venus

Thirsty? Drink Sprite… Cause He’s Taken

5 Comments 17 February 2011

Hey! A little housekeeping: 1) My long-since forgotten Tumblr page dedicated to failed holleration is back! ‘My Name Ain’t Yo’ features reader submissions of the sometimes funny, sometimes infuriating reasons behind our denial of certain gentleman (and lady) callers. Check it out here and submit! 2) This may come as a suprise to some of you, [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Race Matters

Stupid Is The New Rap

19 Comments 21 February 2011

If you know me (or my writing), then you know my attitudes about contemporary Rap music can range from disenchanted to downright curmudgeonly. I have my classic favorites and a handful of new jacks that I co-sign, but I’ll never be the girl singing along with all the radio jams (unless something changes drastically). However, [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Feminist Fight, Mars/Venus

The Extended Adolescence of (Some) American Men

29 Comments 23 February 2011

In a recent article at WSJ.com (the online arm of the Wall Street Journal), writer Kay S. Hymowitz laments the �extended adolescence� period that has been granted to many American men. An adaptation from her upcoming book Manning Up: How The Rise of Women Turned Men Into Boys, the piece cites the �novel sort of [...]

Let�s Talk About Sex, Mars/Venus, Politics/Politricks, Race Matters

Our Bodies, Our Rights…OUR Fight

37 Comments 28 February 2011

This Saturday, my boyfriend and I attended Planned Parenthood’s Walk For Choice in Manhattan’s Foley Square. The rally was organized in response to the recent anti-woman actions of the House of Representatives; as you know, the House recently voted to de-fund Planned Parenthood, in a measure that New York State Senator Chuck Schumer promised would [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

Bougie? I’ll Be That

22 Comments 03 March 2011

(Note: thanks for the answers to my questions about sex and protection! Look for a follow-up post early next week. Also: next Wednesday is March’s Happy Black Girl Day! If you were interested in participating, check this out.) I am coming to terms with something I have long since denied: I’m kinda bougie. Some of [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Mars/Venus

Revenge, Retaliation and Get Back

26 Comments 07 March 2011

Many say that living well is the best revenge, but Jazmine Sullivan surely captured the thoughts of a lot of folks when she suggested breaking a man’s car windows as an alternative get-back plan. Like the infamous Waiting To Exhale scene in which Bernadette tosses all her cheating husband’s belongings atop his car and sets [...]

Feminist Fight, Love For Sale, Race Matters

Happy Black Girl Day: March 2011 Edition

4 Comments 09 March 2011

Happy Happy Black Girl Day! This month, I have to violate my original Happy Black Girl Day rule by posting a couple of links that aren’t happy at all; however, I am happy that I have 1) the opportunity to write and 2) the capabilities to share important information with people such as you, you and especially [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Mars/Venus

Get With This: Your Degrees Won’t Keep You Warm At Night

8 Comments 15 March 2011

For those who rarely travel to the Black blogosphere, the Very Smart Brothas are Panama Jackson and The Champ (featuring site mistress extraordinaire Liz Burr on keys): two hilarious witers who have a wildly popular site in which they tackle dating and mating with a dash of socio-cultural commentary thrown in for good measure. I’ve been [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Feminist Fight, Mars/Venus, Race Matters

Sick Of Rap, Part 314

17 Comments 23 March 2011

Hi! I was in Texas! And we drove and it took over 30 hours each way. Sorry for the lack of updates, but the wi-fi in the van didn’t work for most of the trip. Shout out to everyone I saw at SXSW. I enjoyed it and I hope the big leap of commercialism it took this [...]

Feminist Fight, Life and Times of Sister Toldja

Cruel Summer

13 Comments 28 March 2011

As I mentioned previously, I went to Austin the week before last for SXSW. Upon returning to Brooklyn on Monday, I found that the cold weather (Seriously? Snow in March? FAIL) wasn’t the only thing I had to readjust to. As I ran my errands on Tuesday, I was a little thrown off by something; [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

Grown’s Gone And Got Me

14 Comments 30 March 2011

I’ve never been the serial monogamist type who hops from relationship to relationship. If you ask my friends and family what I was doing romantically prior to my current boyfriend, you’d probably get a few variations of the same answer: “playing around”. It isn’t that I didn’t want a more serious situation, but I was [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Pure Comedy

Getting Down On Five For Friday

8 Comments 01 April 2011

While I realize that discussing internet memes weeks after their emergence is often akin to showing up to a party venue two days after the fact, I’m still not over Rebecca Black’s “Friday”. It’s not just the many, many things that are wrong with the song (why haven’t more people commented on the creepiness of [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Let�s Talk About Sex, Race Matters

Ready To Lie

11 Comments 04 April 2011

Last night, the Negronet was abuzz with word that famed New York DJ Mister Cee (also known for executive producing a little album called Ready To Die) had allegedly been busted for engaging in a sex act in a car with a 20-year-old…man. (Insert dramatic music) As you know, the public don’t take kindly to getting caught [...]

Politics/Politricks

Becky’s Got A Baby

12 Comments 06 April 2011

Yesterday, news hit that Bristol Palin earned over $260k last year in her role as some sort of anti-teen pregnancy spokesperson for the Candies Foundation. Suffer to think of what sort of organization would not only bring young Palin in to talk to their youth, but would pay her for the privilege (my beau’s alma mater actually [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Feminist Fight, Race Matters

Rap Embraces ‘The Gay’ For Pay? I’m Unimpressed

9 Comments 12 April 2011

I had a conversation with one of my brilliant besties* yesterday and I was relieved to find that there was someone else feeling a similar discomfort to mine regarding this recent chatter over Hip-Hop, Black men and homophobia. The arrest of New York’s Mister Cee for allegedly receiving oral sex from a man and revelations in Manning Marable’s recently [...]

Feminist Fight, Race Matters

Happy Black Girl Day: April 2011 Edition

11 Comments 13 April 2011

Happy Black Girl Day! The months are flying by, because it seems like we just had our March celebration. I need a HBGD right now, because I am cranky and the weather is crummy and the beau is out of town on a trip I was originally supposed to go on, but couldn’t afford to [...]

Politics/Politricks, Race Matters

Election Season Blues

7 Comments 18 April 2011

It’s election time again. Where did the past two years go? While there have been plenty of ups, downs, proud moments and disappointments in the Obama administration, it still doesn’t quite seem like he’s been in office that long. Why, we’re still talking about whether or not he was born here? Isn’t that something a [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

Tuesday Bluesday

9 Comments 19 April 2011

Mother Toldja is coming to New York for the first time in the almost-four years I have lived here. You know I am nervous as Donnie Mcclurkin seated next to some trade on a long flight. Did I just say that? Don’t mind me, I ain’t nothing. I’d wanted to show my mom that I [...]

Race Matters

Kidnapped Black Teen Fails To Capture Media Attention

7 Comments 21 April 2011

Could you imagine the story of a young White woman being abducted at gunpoint from a family home going unnoticed by major media outlets and virtually lost amongst even local headlines? Stories of missing White girls and (attractive) White women make national headlines, sometimes years after the victim has been located. However, Black females do [...]

Politics/Politricks, Race Matters, The Gay Is Gonna Getcha, You Should Be Here

New Film Ties Civil Rights Movement and The Marriage Equality Fight

3 Comments 25 April 2011

On Tuesday, Harlem Stage will host the world premiere of the new documentary short film, �Marriage Equality: Byron Rushing and the Fight for Fairness”, which illustrates the connection between the African-American fight for civil rights with that of the LGBT community by examining the work of Byron Rushing, a straight African-American politician from Massachusetts who [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Feminist Fight, Let�s Talk About Sex, Mars/Venus

Bitter Little Pea: Will.I.Am’s Bad Condom Policy

21 Comments 27 April 2011

Hi folks! As I mentioned Monday, I saw Thomas Allan Harris’ wonderful film ‘Marriage Equality: Byron Rushing and the Fight For Fairness’ last night. I will be posting my review later this week, so please stay tuned! Also: Uptown and Madame Noire both published articles last week ‘explaining’ why White women are ‘winning’ when it [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Politics/Politricks

Crazy Like Fox

6 Comments 02 May 2011

Last night, it was announced that Osama Bin Laden was killed in attack by US Forces. I cannot imagine a sadder day that has taken place in the offices of conservative news media outlets and politicians since November 4, 2008. For whatever secret agendas (i.e. the truth behind 9/11, which I will not pretend to [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Race Matters

Big Girls Do Cry, Apparently

36 Comments 03 May 2011

I wasn’t going to blog about this, because I think there are far more important things to be discussed on this site-marriage equality, street harassment, the upcoming New Edition reunion and fat cheeked babies, among them. However, I have a feeling I’m going to keep getting asked about this and so I will write it [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Pure Comedy

Five For Friday: Good Old Internet

2 Comments 06 May 2011

It’s been called to my attention that the content on my site hasn’t been particularly “happy” as of late. While I think that’s more of a reflection on the state of the world than it is on the current condition of my spirit (these aren’t journal entries so much as they are musings on issues [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Politics/Politricks, Race Matters

Patriot Games: Mendenhall’s Poor Choice To Act American

11 Comments 09 May 2011

All that to say: the new defininition of insanity (as opposed to the other one that deals with repition of an old act expectng new results) should be expecting a group of people to be loyal to a country that hasn't treated them well. It's like an abusive or neglectful lover getting angry when their partner doesn't throw them a birthday party; shouldn't you just be glad she didn't set your house on fire and leave?

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Race Matters

The Negronia Meme

12 Comments 11 May 2011

I have made reference here to Negronia many times, but I do realize that there are people who may be confused by that term. Likely because I made it up. Sort of. Boondocks creator Aaron McGruder was the first person to use the word, as far as I know, in a comic strip that I [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Race Matters, The Gay Is Gonna Getcha

CNN Anchor’s Brave Choice To Be Himself

9 Comments 16 May 2011

"As a journalist I believe that part of my mission is to shed light onto dark places. So, the disclosure of this information does not inhibit in any way my ability to be the professional, fair and objective journalist I have always been."

Dirty Pop Culture, Mars/Venus, Politics/Politricks, Pure Comedy, Race Matters, The Gay Is Gonna Getcha

Hot Links, No Swine

4 Comments 18 May 2011

Hey! Thanks to everyone who nominated me for the 2011 Black Weblog Awards! I am honored to be alongside many of my favorite bloggers and sites on this year’s ballot! I’m up for Best Personal Blog and Best Microblog (for my Twitter). If the spirit moves you, please vote here. And again…thanks! Also, I have [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Feminist Fight, Mars/Venus, Race Matters

Web Of Hate

5 Comments 20 May 2011

As someone who writes for a whole gang of websites, I spend a good amount of time reading comments on blog posts and articles. Probably less time than you think, though. Someone recently tweeted that reading the comment sections on major news sites allows readers to see what a KKK meeting must be like; I [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Life and Times of Sister Toldja

Getting Down On Monday

5 Comments 23 May 2011

Hello loves! Hope your weekend was fantastic! Mine was…well…I lived. That counts for something! Actually, I have one of those “Y’all ain’t gonna believe what happened to me/what I did” stories like I used to tell when this blog started back in 2005…but I have too much at stake to tell it here now. WHOMP. [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus

The Beau and The Beautiful (Struggler)

24 Comments 24 May 2011

I got an email the other day from friend-to-the-site Ndygo Sunshine asking when I would update the About Me section of the site to remove “single and mingling”, in light of the fact that I’m in a relationship. That got me to thinking- I’ve talked about The Beau, but I’ve never really introduced y’all to [...]

Fine Arts, Life and Times of Sister Toldja

The Hurt Tape

11 Comments 26 May 2011

Last night, I had the privilege of hearing a few selections from songstress (and fellow Chicago native/HU alumna) ArinMaya, who will be releasing her new album Let The Love Come very soon. One of the songs that she performed was Bonnie Raitt’s classic “I Can’t Make You Love Me”, which has been covered numerous times by artists ranging from [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Fine Arts, Race Matters

Losing Gil, Left With Ruins

11 Comments 31 May 2011

Like many of you, I was heartbroken to learn of the passing of poet/musician/activist Gil Scott Heron this past Friday. I was introduced to his music at a very young age by my parents and fell in love with his work again as a teenager. So many folks only knew the brother for the iconic [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Feminist Fight, Race Matters

Rihanna’s “Man Down” Sparks Absurd Controversy

32 Comments 02 June 2011

Unsurprisingly, there is a small controversy brewing over Rihanna’s new video for “Man Down”. The visually arresting clip opens with the singer shooting a man in a Jamaican town square and then goes back in time to show her happily hanging out with friends and later attending a party, where she meets her soon-to-be murder [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Let�s Talk About Sex, Politics/Politricks

The Clever Weiner Pic Title Well Is Dry

2 Comments 07 June 2011

Yesterday, New York state rep Anthony Weiner failed to surprise people when he announced that the crotch shot that had been Tweeted from his account did, in fact, belong to him. What was a bit more shocking, I suppose, was the revelation that he had been communicating with at least six other women in a [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Race Matters

Dollar Makes No Sense: Where Is The Eddie Long Outrage?

6 Comments 09 June 2011

Like most people with any level of observation of African-American culture, I would agree that the Black church has been a powerful and positive force in our history in this country at many times and on many different levels. Yes, I will continue to use the term “the Black church”, despite the diversity of places [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus

Friday Roundup!

2 Comments 10 June 2011

Happy Friday! What a week, what a week. The Beau and I have been totally overwhelmed by the support we’ve gotten in the McDonald’s Perfect Pair Contest (as well as the emotions that came as our position on the leaderboard went up and down) and we thank those of you who voted! I apologize for [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

This Is The End

9 Comments 13 June 2011

Friends, I have been knocking at your door and tapping at your window pane about this McDonald’s Perfect Pair Contest for a week and some change. Well, you don’t have to worry about that anymore. Today is the final hour. The contest closes at 11:59pm EST. And you won’t hear another peep about it from [...]

Mars/Venus, Race Matters

A Room Of Your Own?

25 Comments 15 June 2011

Black women have Clutch, Madame Noire, Essence, Hello Beautiful and a handful of other popular “lifestyle sites” that cater to us*, and while they are read and supported by people of other races and genders, we are at the center… ***speaking of, I guess this is a good time to announce some new developments. As [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, The Gay Is Gonna Getcha

Lessons In Consequence: Tolerance, Acceptance or Resignation?

7 Comments 14 June 2011

Last week, Tracy Morgan went off on a homophobic tirade during a set at a show in Tennessee. While I fully believe that a straight comic can do a funny gay joke, just as a White one can do a funny race joke, there’s a very big difference between subversive humor and Morgan basically spending [...]

Dirty Pop Culture

Amy Winehouse’s Tragic “Comeback” Show

5 Comments 20 June 2011

When a celebrity is in trouble, the number of voices calling for them to get back to work often drowns out the sounds of those begging them to get the sort of help that they need to live healthy, stable lives. Chris Brown was back in the studio only months after his beatdown of Rihanna [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Race Matters

Embarrassed Of Being Embarrassed

18 Comments 22 June 2011

Confession: Black people embarrass me sometimes. I look at the things that some of my people do and love and believe in and I can’t help but to say “What the f*ck is wrong with y’all?” or “We’re so doomed.” Don’t get me wrong, I understand how we got this way: enslavement, centuries of external [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

Ba Da Ba Ba Baaa…

19 Comments 24 June 2011

OAK BROOK, IL–(Marketwire – Jun 24, 2011) – America cast its vote, and today, McDonald’s USA announced that Jamilah Lemieux and David Giles of Brooklyn are the Winning Pair of McDonald’s Perfect Pair Contest, which asked consumers to pair up and share why they are as perfect a pair as the sweet strawberry and tart lemon in [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

Mama’s Maybe?

10 Comments 27 June 2011

As the creator of the OMO movement*, my peeps know how deep my desire is to have a few little bouncing bundles of joy in the future (and once a month…ladies, you feel me). My biological clock acts all types of wacky, but I’ve put in a request for something to drop down from Baby [...]

Feminist Fight

Keep Feminism’s Name Out Your Mouth

23 Comments 29 June 2011

…unless you know what you are talking about. *inspired by a great convo with a great group of women* Far too often, I’ve heard both men and women attempt to blame feminism for the perceived downfall of contemporary society, the breakdown of the African-American family, the harassment and rape of women and girls that existed long before [...]

Race Matters, You Should Be Here

Support ‘Negro’ Docu-Series!

4 Comments 30 June 2011

Friend to the site Dashira Harris of Venus Genus has taken on a superdope new project and I’d love for you to check it out. She has quit her job (!) to produce Negro, a documentary series about Afro-Latinos. Peep! What is this about? ‘Negro� is a documentary series borne of my life-long interest of [...]

Feminist Fight, You Should Be Here

Birth of a Creep b/w The Window Sex Project

17 Comments 05 July 2011

Do creepy guys know that they are creepy? Do they have any idea that their behavior (or perhaps simply their presence) makes women uncomfortable? How does the decent into McCreeperdom begin? One day, you’re a fairly normal dude who approaches women in a normal, largely respectful way and the next, you just become the guy [...]

Feminist Fight, Mars/Venus, Race Matters

Black Love, Black Pain and a Justice Fail

2 Comments 07 July 2011

There is no universal code or standard for Black behavior; we think, walk, talk and exist in many different ways across the United States and the Diaspora-at-large. Yet we often hear people talking about sticking together, looking out for one another and embracing the concept of �Black love.” Why is this so important to us? [...]

Race Matters

Negronia and Emotional Brand Loyalty

11 Comments 11 July 2011

My mother and I had a long talk yesterday about the ‘rebranding’ of Carol’s Daughter and its questionable choice of new models. A few months ago, the brand debuted a diverse crew of high-yella faces for its latest campaign, with the oddest choice being Cassie (who is rocking straight hair and what looks to be [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

Who Wants To Have A ‘Dumb Mouth’ Anyway?

9 Comments 13 July 2011

I am a smart a*s. I come from a long line of smart as*es. My sisters are smart as*es. My parents are smart as*es. My paternal grandmother was a smart a*s. Okay, that might not be enough trace back to call it a ‘long line’, but this smart a*s life is all I know. Recent [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

Lies My Mother Told Me

15 Comments 18 July 2011

When I was in preschool, I had a mean Happy Meal addiction. Rather, I wanted them everyday and my mom had the good sense not to allow such an indulgence. After a particularly annoying whining session, one of my friend’s mothers told us “The Golden Arches fell down. We can’t go until they are fixed.” [...]

Dirty Pop Culture, Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus, Race Matters

Eternal Gloom Of The Cluttered Mind

6 Comments 20 July 2011

Whatup, fam? My birthday is this week and I am as excited about it as Sarah Palin on Juneteenth. I’m actually not celebrating it right now (more on that Friday), but it has managed to add to my gloom and doom about the world right now. Not everything is bad. I’m happy with a few [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

No Birthday Today

4 Comments 22 July 2011

Today is my birthday and, as I did last year, I’m postponing my celebration until a later date. In 2010, I was injured and didn’t want to party on a cane. This time around, I’m just a bit horrified by how old I am and where this moment has found me. I need to get [...]

Dirty Pop Culture

Shook By The Inevitable

10 Comments 25 July 2011

I don’t think many celebrity deaths in my lifetime have been as predictable as Amy Winehouse’s passing at the age of 27 this weekend. When I wrote this post last month, I felt like the woman did not look long for this world. I truly wish I had been wrong. Despite never being a huge [...]

Feminist Fight

Why Shouldn’t Rape Victims Get Paid?

30 Comments 27 July 2011

One of the many damning charges leveled against Nafissatou Diallo is that she has falsified her account of being raped by Dominique Strauss Kahn for financial gain. Why do we assume that a victim who wants retribution from her assailant has to be lying? I was raped in July of 2007, two days before I was scheduled to move from DC [...]

Feminist Fight, Life and Times of Sister Toldja

The Pressure To Reproduce

12 Comments 03 August 2011

E-friend Drew-Shane recently posed a question to me about women being pressured to have kids. It’s funny, because as much as I have heard other girls my age and older complain about feeling pushed by friends and family to get their baby game up, I have to say that most of the pressure I feel [...]

Mars/Venus

What’s Up With The Love?

8 Comments 08 August 2011

I recall having a conversation (which led to a post) about a year ago regarding marriage’s need for better “PR” if its going to compel the men of my generation to walk down the aisle. I think we did a little cart-before-horse move when enaging that subject without questioning what has got so many folks [...]

Dirty Pop Culture

America Loves ‘The Help’, Needs Some Help

28 Comments 15 August 2011

When I wrote this piece a few months ago, I felt like I had said all I needed to say about Kathryn Stockett’s The Help book and film. I didn’t want to read or see it, I was clear on that and I thought it was wack that we were getting yet another story about the [...]

Dirty Pop Culture

Music Documentaries: The Fine Line Between Truth and Propaganda

1 Comment 16 August 2011

Music Documentaries: The Fine Line Between Truth and Propaganda Somewhere between nostalgia and worship lies the strange hybrid called the music documentary. One part education to two parts entertainment, the music documentary of the past has stood as a sort of testament to a band�s singular moment in history. Martin Scorsese�s The Last Waltz is [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus

Cheating Hearts and Cyber Thugs

14 Comments 22 August 2011

Good morning! An editor said of me recently “Jamilah writes for every Black site on the internet”. This is sorta true, so I hope that y’all have forgiven me for my latest quiet spell around these parts. If you ever miss me (aww!) over here, these are the other places I can be found: Essence Online [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

Roundup

0 Comments 24 August 2011

Happy Humpday! As requested on Monday, here are some summaries of my work from the week thus far…if you like what you see, please click the links to read more! I will be announcing (that word makes me sound more important than I think I am, I swear) a posting schedule for this site on [...]

Dirty Pop Culture

Quiet Storm

6 Comments 29 August 2011

I hope all you guys fared well in the storm this weekend. I was very lucky that my area was not hit hard and the only real inconvenience we suffered was the lose of train service. I was, however, disheartened by the number of people who are complaining about the lack of impact they felt [...]

Fine Arts, Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Race Matters

‘Infiltrating Hollywood’ Examines the Legacy of The Spook Who Sat By The Door

1 Comment 30 August 2011

Good morning, Internet friends! Many of you are familiar with Sam Greenlee’s iconic book The Spook Who Sat By The Door and the film adaptation, which was released in 1974. The Spook tells the tale of a Black man who is chosen to take a ‘token’ role as a CIA agent and uses his government training [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja

Another Roundup!

0 Comments 31 August 2011

Good Morning! It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood, wouldn’t you agree? I’d like to share a few of my other clips from the week-to-date. Give them a read if you are interested! Sad to say, I don�t think I can name more than two people in my life who know how to adequately ask [...]

Fine Arts, Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Love For Sale

Come On Down To Avenue A

2 Comments 06 September 2011

I would hate being a musician, if only because it seems hard as hell to compel people to listen to your music if they haven’t had it before. I think I now understand the misguided logic that guides young men to try and sell their CDs outside the grocery store or on the train without [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Mars/Venus

One Year In: What I’ve Learned

13 Comments 13 September 2011

Tomorrow is the day that my boyfriend and I have designated as our one-year-anniversary (we opted to acknowledge the day of our first ‘official’ date). What a difference a year makes. If you had asked me last September if I expected to be spending less time partying, more time cooking for two and cuddling around the [...]

Life and Times of Sister Toldja, Politics/Politricks

Home Again

5 Comments 19 September 2011

I’m in Chicago! Been here since Thursday. It’s my first trip back since the Winter holidays and anytime I can spend an entire week with my family is a good time for me. Yay to that. I have been surprised and humbled to have been recognized by a number of folks here who read this [...]

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